Conflict -have you had one lately? It seems to be everywhere. How do you begin resolving conflicts? People refuse to listen to another’s opinion because it differs from theirs. What happens inside us to create a wall between us and another? Is is really so threatening to us that others don’t agree with us?
Resolving conflicts- is it even possible? I have spent the past year thinking about this topic. The political climate in the U.S. has been creating a division for years. My question -what can we do?
As a child, I always hated conflict. It was present every day in my early years and it never had any resolution. It recycled and increased in size and intensity. My father’s capacity for conflict was stellar due to his untreated bipolar disorder. It was painful to see the devastation that these differences of opinions created. I only wished someone could figure out how to resolve some of these conflicts. Unfortunately, no one had the skills to succeed.
As I reached adulthood, I assumed that the conflicts were due solely to Dad’s mental illness. I realized that wasn’t true. I began to look for ways to be free of the stress that conflict raised. I found out almost everyone is unskilled in resolving conflicts.I began to look for ways to be free of the stress that conflict raised. I found out almost everyone is unskilled in… Click To Tweet
Some fight like a dog with a bone to win, some flee and some freeze. The fear response kicks in, the creation of stress has taken over our world.
This is what I’ve found to help resolve conflict…We need to
- find ways to deactivate the fear response because it will get activated. We are human and it is hardwired into us for survival.
- question ourselves if it is warranted in this conflict situation.
- manage our despair. We may give hope if we have experienced repeating patterns of non-resolution.
In short, we have to manage our emotional reactions.
We are in an emotional energy dance, repeating similar patterns over again. We are being triggered by our past experiences.We are in an emotional energy dance, repeating similar patterns over again. We are being triggered by our past… Click To Tweet
We need to realize we are fighting a conflict in present time that was once lost in past time. We are still struggling to win an old conflict – it is impossible. No wonder we are frustrated!
I have developed a process to resolve conflicts, utilizing energy awareness, mindfulness and self-reflection. I’ve condensed it into a free 7-day challenge, containing prompts for journaling for 7 days, delivered through email. It helps to uncover the triggers, awaken insights, and broker a peace within ourselves as a way to resolve outer conflicts. find out more here
I would love to help you on this journey to Resolving Conflicts: Inner Paths to Peace. No one wants to be in the pain of unresolved conflicts. Learn the skills and put them to work in your life. I’m not promising nirvana, but I know it will help you to find the freedom you seek.